Good day!
I skipped out on posting yesterday, because to be brutally honest, as soon as I got home, i pulled on my leggings and I fell atop my fresh, clean, white linen and proceeded to doze off for about 2 hours, I was ridiculously tired for a monday evening. I woke up half way through my nap, slightly flustered with the lesser spotted ginger feline curled up close to my heart, so I allowed myself to drift off again. It is amazing how soothing a little warm, purring fluffball can be to a half asleep human.
Anyway, yesterday was the first day of super healthy eating. After a weekend filled with naughty foods and lazing about, come Sunday evening D and I were both feeling awfully lethargic and all round gross, emphasis on round. We made an extremely hasty agreement to be reasonably healthy for the next 10 weeks. By the time summer holidays come, you bet your ass you'll be seeing us frolicking in the waves at the beach.
All this diet/health/food stuff has got me googling and pinning "perfect bodies" and in turn - got me thinking about body image. When I get on a health kick, I immediately go onto Pinterest and totally wreck my self confidence and kill my appetite by pinning and flicking through +- a billion pictures of gorgeous, perfect ,thin ,tanned and toned individuals. I guilt myself and make myself feel really horrid for not looking just like that or not being super thin or super toned or super tan or whatever particular area I am being rough on myself about that day.
As I am typing this, I know just how silly it sounds and I know that a couple of you may be yawning and a couple of you may have serious feminist views on the subject, I also know that there may be a few of you who are nodding your heads and going "mmhmm", but at the end of the day, I am just being honest here, these are just my feelings. Also, I am not going to stop pinning inspirational bods.
Instead of admiring these beautiful women, setting myself reasonable goals and becoming inspired to be my optimum self...I get depressed and down about the person I am already.
This is not a blog post about not being able to admire beautiful women enjoying the body they have worked for or a blog post about societies view of women, this is simply a blog post about me not allowing myself to love my own body because I haven't quite been able to get my head around the fact that: I am my own kind of perfect.
So this spins all the way back to leggings as pants. The other day (can't quite remember which day) I hopped out of a steaming hot milk bath and pulled on some black leggings and a white vest (one of those super comfy woolies vests with built in support - I live in them) and I swung around to hang up my towel and caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, I became increasingly curious as to what it is about my body that I am so self conscious about and why.
I wouldn't say that I have "body issues" but there are certainly things I am always wanting to change, depending on the day or mood, obviously. So as I stood and looked at myself in the mirror, I decided that there was one thing I DID need to change and that was the way I see myself. My body is my body and I love my body the most when it is working as a well oiled machine. It may not be when I am my thinnest or my most tan or perhaps even my fittest but I love my body the most when I am my healthiest, inside and out.
So instead of standing in front of the mirror and picking myself to pieces, I looked at myself in a different light, a lighter light. Like a real dork, I spoke to myself and said things like: "I am so lucky to have a really lovely hourglass shape" and "I have great, thick, long, glossy hair", from top to bottom I noted all the good things about myself and said them out loud. By the time I finished up I not only felt a kak ton beter about myself, but I was able to look upon improvements to my body as improvements instead of insults.
Guys, I am swinging into 24 on a rope of self confidence and body-love, in 16 days (just throwing that out there)
Your body is a magnificent and magical thing, treat it with care and compassion and spoil it with goodness and good 'ol fashioned health.
So go on, chuck 1 litre of full cream milk and a few tablespoons of honey into your bath, you won't know yourself!
Duffymoon
xxx
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